Happy New Year
New Year’s is such a strange holiday, a holiday about one second. A holiday about the impossible incrementalism of time. Still, my heart pounds at any kind of countdown. We didn’t have a countdown this year. We went up on the roof in our matching N3-B parkas with the champagne around 11:55, thinking we’d watch […]
Read MoreChristmas Day
On this warm, wet Christmas, I ambled without purpose somewhere in America. I prefer the inevitable disappointment of a sodden Christmas–the remains of an earlier December snowfall dribbling down storm drains, the exiled smokers unshivering, unbothering with jackets, their exhales elongated by the humidity, the coziness of houses all the more fakely theatrical against temperatures […]
Read MoreMerry Mary’s Cherry
We here at SuperLefty try not to let a holiday go by without turning a critical eye toward the goings on. What is the real meaning of all the lacivious discussion of a dead, trussed bird? Why exactly are we gathering to celebrate the slaughter of the firstborn sons of our ethnically different neighbors? Why […]
Read MoreTransit Strike Diary, Days 2 & 3
Day 2: Did not leave immediate neighborhood. Day 3: Walked from North Brooklyn to Midtown, boarded train, left entire city. At the exact moment expensive Amtrak train left Penn Station, service was restored. From 200 miles north, I can feel the L train rumbling, and with equal contentment, the well-deserved, intact 4% of workers’ salaries […]
Read MoreTransit Strike Diary: Day 1
“I thought I would be rich in America, but I am not,” said Malik, my companion during the ninety-minute trip from Williamsburg to Park Slope earlier tonight. In the first evening rush hour of the transit strike, we crawled through bumper-to-bumper traffic as I tried to make my way to a 7:00 tutoring appointment. Sometimes […]
Read MoreAn Open Letter to the Officials of the United States Government Expressing Gratitude for What Their Interest In My Reproductive System Has Done For Me
Dear Officials of the United States Government, Not long ago, I wrote to thank you for your interest in my reproductive system. But I never expressed my gratitude for all the benefits I have reaped from your interest in my reproductive system. You see, around the time of my sexual maturity, I was something of […]
Read MoreA SanSerif Outpost
SuperLefty has been tapped by some kind of vast liberal mega-blog. You may join the betting pool to see how long it takes before they notice she doesn’t really care about politics by sending an email Subject: SuperLefty Thinks All Politics Are A Method of Mind Control Betting Pool to the address at the bottom […]
Read MoreThe Youth
One of the early signs of aging I have noticed is that I can’t stay up for two straight days anymore. Another is that I harrumph into my newspaper when teenagers make noise on the train. I ride the train with a lot of teenagers, since I go to work when they get out of […]
Read MoreHappiness
Rebecca (Bert to my Ernie, Rachel to my Monica, Trapper to my Hawkeye) overheard this conversation on the subway the other day. Two young bankers were talking, the kind who look like they just removed their baseball caps and sexual double-entendre t-shirts, hit the group shower for an invigorating rinse and towel-snapping and pulled on […]
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