2015 August : {superlefty}

My Presidential Platform: About the Bullet

Posted by emily on August 31, 2015 · 2 Comments

No one needs to “take a bullet” for me.

Filed under Uncategorized · Tagged with 35, bullet, security, The President of the United States

My Presidential Platform: About the Football

Posted by emily on August 30, 2015 · 1 Comment

Please allow me to address your natural concerns about my being in control of a vast arsenal of nuclear weapons.

Filed under Uncategorized · Tagged with 35, homeland security, nuclear weapons, nukes, security, the football, The President of the United States

My Presidential Platform: The Second Amendment and Guns

Posted by emily on August 29, 2015 · 1 Comment

Here is what we are going to do about guns. Superman is going to help.

Filed under Uncategorized · Tagged with 35, children, guns, safety, Second Amendment, Superman, The President of the United States

My Presidential Platform: Ethics, Baseball, and the Elimination of the Senate

Posted by emily on August 28, 2015 · Leave a Comment

The United States Senate will no longer be concerned with the use of steroids in professional sports. In fact, the United States Senate will no longer be concerned with anything, because it will be abolished as per the advice of Harper’s magazine. Click to read more.

Filed under Uncategorized · Tagged with 35, baseball, ethics, steroids, The President of the United States

My Presidential Platform: Security Detail

Posted by emily on August 27, 2015 · 2 Comments

An even better option than the Secret Service: Jewish parents.

Filed under Uncategorized · Tagged with 35, Judaism, parents, safety, Secret Service, security, The President of the United States

{superlefty}

My Presidential Platform: About the Bullet

My Presidential Platform: About the Football

My Presidential Platform: The Second Amendment and Guns

My Presidential Platform: Ethics, Baseball, and the Elimination of the Senate

My Presidential Platform: Security Detail

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{SUPERLEFTY}