Last night at 1:30 a.m. I called up a Fry’s Pharmacy in Arizona and asked, “Why wouldn’t you provide the morning-after pill to a rape victim who needed it?” I did this because I was instructed to do at the end of a free newspaper sex advice column that counted among this week’s topics: How […]
» Read more «Wikipedia has a little box on their website where they report the news, and consequently I am sometimes drawn against my better judgement down a bread crumb trail in the internet to the Real News. While dabbling in the Real News I dwell on such teeth-gnashing inevitabilities of the past week as the 2,000 casualty […]
» Read more «Holly returned from six weeks in the Far East and the Pacific Northwest. In my excitement over her return and subsequent digital photo slideshow, I drank three martinis on an empty stomach and confirmed once and for all that my body’s ability to process alcohol is not what it used to be. We were talking […]
» Read more «There is this essay contest in which you can win $10,000 and a Mont Blanc pen, so I thought I’d enter it. You also get a trip to a writer’s conference in Italy, bringing the total value of the grand prize to approximately $17, 775, according to the fine print on the contest website. Even […]
» Read more «Today I fell in love with a song. Its name is “The Bleeding Heart Show” and it is Track 4 on the new New Pornographers album, Twin Cinema. I haven’t felt this way since “New Slang” by The Shins. It’s curious, how a new song can be just like a new love. All day, I […]
» Read more «One family I tutor for had two bunnies that the pet store promised them were both males. They were hoping that one of them was “just fat.” But the fat bunny was not “just fat.” He was a she and she was pregnant and she had babies. Now there are six bunnies. Things were a […]
» Read more «You might not think there are a whole lot of nuances to riding the bus, but there are dozens of subtle differences between a good bus ride and a bad bus ride. Having taken up with a man who lives four hours up the crowded main artery of our megalopolis, I ride the bus. I […]
» Read more «Today is my 26th Birthday. It’s also Joan Jett’s, Scott Baio’s, Nick Cave’s, Shari Belafonte’s, Eric Stolz’s, Tommy Lasorda’s and Wally Backman’s birthday. Wally Backman was the second baseman for the 1986 New York Mets. Today is also the Autumnal Equinox. At 6:23 p.m. EDT, the sun crosses the celestial equator and fall begins. Today […]
» Read more «We really don’t want to hear about anyone else’s dreams unless we’re in them, and even then, it’s not that interesting. At some point you realize that it’s not you who gave this person a broken egg, or flew into a wall, but just another projection of the dreamer’s own consciousness. It’s never that revealing. […]
» Read more «I almost forgot today was today. I kept remembering, and then forgetting again. New tragedies are happening now. But then I saw the big blue ghostly lights towering in the sky like tractor beams for some alien ship and I remembered. Four years ago it seemed as if the world had changed forever and would […]
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