{superlefty}

Observing

And now let us pause, briefly, and remember a time before Homeland Security, a time before this was the homeland, before this land was the center of our empire, a stronghold from which our empire could invade other countries, kill the people there and get away with it by calling them “savage,” or some new, […]

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Ignorance is Bliss

It’s Friday night and I’ve declined socialization to wash my hair and tend small fires in my house. Very small fires–the one under the coffeepot, the one in the incense holder, and the one that rests in the ashtray. Smoke is curling pleasantly around the room and I’m ignoring my just-washed hair in the hopes […]

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Coming Soon…A Brief, Passionate Word About Movie Previews

I love movie previews. I love the green screen with the words: The Following Preview Has Been Approved for All Audiences by the Motion Picture Association of America. I love the very rare red screen that denotes that the preview itself has been rated “R.” What does that mean? Do these previews have bare butts […]

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Jay Leno, The Man Who Defamed Me

Earlier this week, when I read on the covers of other subway riders’ copies of the Daily News and New York Post (having sworn off all news media until after the election as a precautionary measure against apoplexy) that Jay Leno will hand over the reins of The Tonight Show to Conan O’Brien in 2009, […]

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Losing All Focus

In my continuing quest for cheap thrills and deeper insight into the theory of knowledge and the nature of consciousness, I have subjected my body and being to a variety of dangers. I have sustained abrasions and contusions major and minor. I have killed many brain cells. I have travelled to distant lands and walked […]

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25 Things I Learned By the Age of 25

1. There is no inherent merit in any kind of labor or work. Most of what we call “work” in the so-called developed world is bullshit designed to distract you from fun and the harsh material reality of globalized capitalism. Feed yourself and and have a good time because soon you’ll be dead and this […]

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Hangover

It’s been a while since I had a good old-fashioned hangover. I can’t say I’ve really been missing them. I think I jinxed myself a while ago, because I actually said out loud, “You know, I haven’t drank myself sick and had a vile hangover in quite some time! Maybe I’ve finally learned moderation!” Then […]

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The Most Boring Dream Anyone Has Ever Had

I dreamt I located my long-lost Social Security Card. The number on the card was 001-01-0001. “That’s weird,” I thought. “That’s not my Social Security Number.”

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Tenfold

I wish I believed, as some perversely excited Democrats do, that the 1,000-casualty mark is going to be the fact that will wake up America. Not the 2000 election, not the Supreme Court, not Florida, not the crashing economy, not Enron, not Halliburton, not the blown CIA cover, not the faked intelligence, not the documented […]

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Parallel Structure

While the FUCK YOU Movement made it abundantly clear that we are AGAINST EVERYONE and FOR NO ONE (or at least for no one who could make it into mainstream politics), I would like to offer this tidbit of editorial advice to the Kerry/Edwards campaign. The title of your book Our Plan for America: Stronger […]

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